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Saturday, July 14, 2012

why do you do this to me?

xxx: sape kau?

maria: sape kau?

xxx: apasal kau femes?

*sigh*

many times i get this kind of questions. and seriously, i rasa awkward gila. jari mau jawab "aku tak femes, aku makan famous amos je" tapi hati mau jawab "aku pun tak tau. tanya orang yang cakap seperti apa anda dakwa kan"

ini, saya cerita kepada pembaca sekalian, bukan untuk tunjuk macho atau hensem, but sebab i like typing up my blogposts as if i'm talking to friends. friends who would understand. kalau tak understand pun, will try to understand.
i'm not sure why, but i'm like that. bear with me, please? =)

people now have expectations for me.
some expect to see a crazy lunatic yang hyper 24-7, some expect a hajah-like muslimah yang cukup hebat bab islam, some expect to see a stylish person, some expect to see a tall person, some expect a big person, and much much more.

it's tough, i tell you that.
why?
because i'm me. and the way i am, i'm all those mixed up in one body. i am hyper at times, religious at times, selekeh boleh, fashionable sket boleh, i can be either tall or short to you, i can be either big or small to you.
in some unfortunate events, i will not fulfill your expectations.

let's play a pretend game. you don't know me, i don't know you. but for some reason we have each others' facebooks, so we both cam kenal muka la. and one fine day, i see you face to face and i say "la. you tak tinggi pun!"
apa you rasa?
sentap kot.

let's say you dulu terror gila in something. let's say batu seremban. orang sume kenal you because of your awesome batu seremban skills. then one day, you just stopped playing coz you moved on to something else, something that makes you even more happier than before. but people keep asking you "main la batu seremban lagi. main laaaaa. bila nak main lagi ni???"
how would you feel?

can you understand that feeling? 
you go through your normal days as usual, but then some people expect you to be the way they think you should be, but when they don't see the resemblance between the 'real you' and the 'expected you', they get disappointed and make you feel bad for not being able to be the 'expected you' with them.

faham kah?

so back to the beginning. like uolls, iolls pun ada time time i tunjuk taring and time i sorok taring. it's normal, kannnn? =)

oh, and please don't ever call yourself a fan. i won't allow it. unless you want to be fan = kipas. so you choose la, nak kipas dinding or kipas meja. or kipas laptop tu.
tu i allow. =p

i was a fan once. i was so into this one artist and alhamdulillah i had the opportunity to meet him face to face. and guess what. i was disappointed. i went back home after that wondering why i was disappointed and i discovered.. it was simply because he was normal. i was expecting him to be singing and dancing when meeting me, i guess, which i thought at that moment, was completely unfair of me. since then, i just want to be an admirer. i take the good points from a person, and that's it. =)

a man is a man. a woman is a woman.
they can be famous and macho and beautiful, but in the end, they're just like everybody else. normal.

anyway, i stopped trying to live up to people's expectations, but it still hurts when people have that 'look', you know?
sometimes i tersentap sangat, that i just get really frustrated with myself. but it's weird.. coz i am supposed to be the way i am.. 

so now maria, what are you trying to say?
simple.

stop expecting.

why should we expect on others when we ourselves have not done our best in fulfilling Allah SWT's expectations on us?
it would mean a lot to so many people if we just stop expecting.
it would be a lot better if we can be considerate of other people's feelings.
it would be so much better if we fulfill our expectations for Allah SWT's sake, and not anybody's - note to self.


it would be so great if people would stop expecting me to reply to their tweets, messages, facebook friend's requests too. i don't live in the internet. i have work and classes now so i can't entertain everyone. it really hurts when people think i'm being sombong just because i don't reply their tweets or "don't notice them". masyAllah..


...

i really hope that i won't see that 'look' anymore =')

this is a bit off topic but it's a reminder for us all =)

Abu Hurairah reported Allah's Messenger (may peace and blessing be upon him) as saying: "Verily Allah does not look to your faces and your wealth but He looks to your heart and to your deeds." (Sahih Muslim : Book 32, Number 6221)

i just want to remind you brothers and sisters to not be so into your looks, wealth, status, etc etc. all those things, "gifts", can turn into something bad like riya', ego, arrogance, and ungratefulness.
nauzubillah min zalik! 
we must avoid being swept away by worldly matters! we need to get our hearts purified, cleaned up and filled with love for Allah SWT. we need to remember that this life is temporary, whereas the Hereafter, is forever. in sha Allah.. 

may our hearts be in it's best condition at all times. =)

sekian saja.
jazakallah khair.
assalamualaikum.

ps: i sympathise all new muslim converts yang always have to face expectations from born-muslims. i've heard on radio about how some can actually expect a convert to be able to read the Quran immediately. such thinking is prejudice and un-islamic, so please be kind to our fellow mualaf k peeps. =) 

116 comments:

Deleted said...

Whoo , u talk like hlovate =)

aynaz said...

cool kak maria = )

Nisa Kay said...

Ya Allah.. baca entry Maria Elena macam baca luahan hati sendiri! Thanks Maria :') Suka sangat entry you sebab you jujur. Saya juga merasakannya..

BSBM 2009-2013 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Fatin Pidrus said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Yuyu Zulaikha said...

SUkaaa sangattttt ^^

sjaa64 said...

nice one! totally agree :)

Unknown said...

people, slalu sangat expect kita jadi mcm dorg,faham dorg,ikut cara dorg etc etc. nak jadi diri seniri pun tak boleh ke -.-

Lunia said...

TRUE! be yourself. dont be what others expect u to be. :)

Tsaqib Al-Hasawi said...

Thumbs up! Agreed with all of your point.

apricot pie said...

betul2..people stop expecting.kak maria chill je..ingnore org cmni.wlupun kdg2 kita kena kasi luah biar mreka faham.tp,xpyah la smpn2 dlm bnda cmni..mnusia..normal la..mybe die trlalu obses dgn u..smpi mmbygkan yg hebat2 blaka..tp,if they really like..xptut pun nk ckp bukan2..klu kita suka,kte ckp baik2 n jga prasaan org..so..just call they are the haters..;p.wink.!

haziqa said...

yes. Agree that. :-)

Unknown said...

bila nak buat vlog lagi?

Elia Si Jejariruncing said...

You read my mind! This entry is soo true and as if u hv written all that I hv in mind. R u a mindfreak or something!?ƗƗɐƗƗɐƗƗɐ"̮ .kidding.btw,just b urself n sooner or later ppl will know what's going on n that ure just as normal as everybody else. Chill k?

emymilya said...

Omg maria. Been there done that too! Stay cool. Only those who are close with u know u well. But that again, hidup bukan utk menagih pujian dari manusia. Stop pleasing people, try to please Allah. :)

Yusoff Maulana said...

Why dont u make a sentap vlog so that they will get more understand :-)

hana said...

setuju2..
jgn expect lebe2..
kita kan manusia normal...
=D

faqihahhusni said...

setuju!!

p/s ramainya blogger pemes komen.. terasa terasing sebentar

Izzati Athani said...

Assalamualaikum Maria.
I've been reading your blog for a long time. But this time, this entry. Baru tergerak hati nak tulis some two cents of mine. Hopefully you tak scroll2 then tak perasan this one. Hihi.

Maria, apa yang saya lihat, faham, dan terjemah sendiri adalah...

This is the outcome for being well-known. Being a public figure is never easy. I am not a public figure myself but I understand the feeling you've got there. The expectation. The hope. The "Lah, ni ke orangnya? Kenapa dia tak macam tuh? Macam nih?" feeling.

People will never stop talking. People will never stop comparing.
People will never stop expecting.
And that's us, too.

Whatever happens in the future, Maria. Saya doakan awak sentiasa senyum walau kiri kanan depan belakang mencebik ke arah awak.

InshaAllah. :)



-Manusia Biasa2-

haz said...

btol3.. stuju sgt ape yg kak maria ckp nie.. bwk byk bersbr ye. just be urself okay! ^^

Anonymous said...

Assalamualaikum.

Bersabar kay Kak Maria. People will never stop expecting, judging and whatsoever. Even I bukan public figure, and I macam "eh Malaysia kenal kee I?", I faham perasaan you sis. Sometimes, kawan kawan kita pun boleh buat macam tu kat kita kan.

So, kak Maria, hope you terus sabar hadapi semua ni, and keep on posting great posts.

Lots of love, Fea.

P/s: Tapi kan, seriously I minat kak Maria. Tapi taknak laa jadi kipas. Malu haha

Unknown said...

aduhai... sabar ya, qalbi...

Anasyg said...

this is plus-one y i put u as ma fav blogger, ur words kan mar...aduhai, inspiring.

.. said...

Assalamua'alaikum..
Luv ur post..(bukan nak bodek ya hehe)

i'm mualaf..masa nk masuk islam daftar kat jaheins,1st sekali staff dorang tanya "nak kawin ker?"..saya cuma senyum jer..dlm hati terasa jgk la.. xkan nak kawin baru nak masuk islam..huhu sedih2...tapi xpela manusia..sy pun pernah gak macam tu :) sy pernah expect sorang kawan sy tu mesti dah mahir baca Al- Quran sbb dia mmg lahir sebagai islam,tapi last2 sy dapat tahu yg alif ba ta pun dia blum kenal.. Huhu sy rasa bersalah dn kesian dbuatnya dn at last sy pulak bantu dia..mungkin bacaan Al-Quran sy xlancar sangat InsyaAllah semoga segalaNya dpermudahkan..

Mr feckry said...

kesedaran indahnya Al-quran jadi pd gua, bile gua melihat sahabat gua yang baru convert mengaji..Allahurabbi, nak menitis gua, indahnya dia alunkan kalam suci..

aqel said...

stop expecting. so true.
bertabahlah maria.
just be urself. =)

JMR said...

Good wording ME!

nurdani said...

betul sangat-sangat. kita manusia biasa sahaja

Lisa said...

This is soooo true! i wish people today are more considerate and expect less. maybe sometimes people expect more from you because they wanted something the best out of you, and you may at the end be better. but whatever it is, i hope those who read this latest post of kak maria's will get the point. be considerate, people!

btw, kak maria, i'm your admirer! <3

fadyxc said...

just ignore je this type of people...there are everywhere, just ignore and u'll be happy^^

Aku Normal said...

we dont need to please people but to please Allah is the most important thing :) jzkk for this post

Diana Wanawin said...

bravo to you. even im a hijaber from the beginning, I think you are better than me siyesly. sometimes I get ashamed to those who 'berhijrah' and they look very good than before masyallah. :) btw, thanx or inspiring me. thank you so much. before this I don't think that a hijaber can 'mandi manda' kat air terjun like you do hikhik. neway, been reading your blog for quite sometimes. I follow your twitter too and of coz liked your facebook page. thanx a lot sis. keep on blogging and keep up the good attitude and spreading mahmudahs' goodness. always supporting you. sincerely: Your silent reader yang dah tak silent dah =p wslm. MGBU. take care. muahh ^__^

Cik tikah said...

org jeles je tnya mcm tuh maria oii.. :)

sayakayrulez said...

phd= perasaan hasad dengki..!

lagi2 org melayu..
puii.!

sayakayrulez said...

phd= perasaan hasad dengki..!

lagi2 org melayu..
puii.!

Chef Kampung said...

wiwwwitttt kak mariaaa

mujagirl92 said...

i accept you the way you are kak maria,,,, lov you!!! :D

fya zainal said...

U got ur point!! Apapun. Bawa besabar byk :)

People won't stop talking or judging or whatsoever. But it won't stop u to be urself..be normal kan :)

Anonymous said...

ignore je. mulut orang takleh nak halang. dier penat kite tak layan nnt dier diam la tuh.
bdw :
slalunya mualaf lebih menampak kearah sunnah drpd borny-muslims..
amek iktibar..tenkiu for sharing.

:)

puteri cahaya said...

=) tak perlu kata apa2....

alessandramyralf said...

wah~itu tandanya u da jadi public figure darls!!! people starts expecting u mcm ne mcm tuh~ juz chill~ i know u can handle it~ all da best!

hanani fiee said...

sabar kak maria.
lrg xknl memang ckp buruk2..
be cool yaw~~

Unknown said...

just be urself..enough kan kak maria..hehe..=)

✿INA AINAA✿ said...

betul tu syg.. kalau tak ada usaha, tak datang kejayaan tu.. hur,, sabar ye sis.. by the way, ena menjadi contoh sis sebgai ilham sy untuk menjadi yg lebih baik...

Unknown said...

Very well said Maria. Just be yourselves and what you are. It is not easy to please everybody moreover if you already being popular that is the price we have to pay. However the remote control is on your hand it's all depend on you to handle the situation and over come the problem in a professional way. May ALLAH always blessing and protecting you sister.


Sincerely regards,
Hartina Arssid
www.mylittlewing12.com

Bella said...

luahan perasaan yg jujur..:)

nawariah :) said...

suka sangat entri ni . :)

Kekzamanis said...

MM setuju dengan pendapat Maria tu.. Kita hanya perlu jadi diri kita yang sebenar.. Tak perlu nak follow whatever peoples expected us to be.. Kita ada cara sendiri, kita ada kehidupan sendiri, just go on whith our life style.. We can never force others to always like us coz every single person are unique.. =)

safiah sokher said...

Good point Kak Mar =)

Namee Roslan said...

u jadi public figure sbb u best. hehe maria !!hey, saya namee ! the one yang ajak u snap photo time u nak pergi ambil dessert kat wedding aishah ! haha, sorry sebab kacau dan minta nak ambil photo. hihi. but i read u a lot. :)) . nice to meet ya ! :D thank u maria !

Unknown said...

So peoples, stop complaining or expecting more on something. We're just human, not more than that.

Unknown said...

Saya nampak Maria dalam .com dua minggu lepas hehehehehe

Unknown said...

famous amos sgt seronok untuk digigit.

ku farah said...

suka ja baca blog kak maria..simple english..=)

Unknown said...

cool la kak maria. Orang suke sgt expect lebey lebey, den bile dorang tak suke. dorang kutuk bagai.

kite semua manusia biasa :) chill yea sista <3

Myra Abdullah said...

nothing to say,
sis you're the best.hehehe

Naim Iman said...

long post. terjegil mata baca. btw just b who u r. live life to the fullest :)

Unknown said...

Lumrahnya hidup seorang blogger. Kadang dipuji dan kadang dihina. Kadang manusia dikata untuk membuat si kata itu rasa lebih hebat atau untuk memastikan (double confirm) apa yang dia tanggap tentang orang yang dikata itu tidaklah sehebat mana. Just take it with a pinch of salt ( i know you will) because bila orang mengata atau menyinggung perasaan kita, Allah sedang berbicara kepada kita betapanya kerdilnya kita walau ada yang memuji. Btw, u are awesome although you may be short as a midget, tall as a giant, grumpy as one of snow white dwarfs...=)

Nuruashia said...

ignore others sis :)
btw, u looks so beautiful in Hijabista <3
adore u sis :)

Cik IvaFarid said...

Agreed.

mia kaftiya said...

saya 'dapat' sesuatu lepas baca entri ini. "..not be so into your looks.." masyaallah, mia.. *istifar*

Islamic Inspirations said...

The Wisdom Of Faith

Miss Nea said...

thumbs up!!! (=^o^=)

nuraqilah hishammuddin said...

salam sis!
kita tak bole nak puaskan hati semua pihak..kita hanya manusia biasa..
even,nabi Muhammad,semulia2 manusia pun dihina dgn begitu dahsyat skali!
So,sis..dont even think about it!
as long as kita masih djlan yg benar,masih dlm proses mmperbaiki diri,masih menyempurnakan syariat Allah..
Actually,'org' tu mungkin tdk berapa senang hati,jeles maybe..hehe

Tapi,ramai lagi bersama sis termasuk saya!!!!!^_^...teehee
Allah pun ada!

smaug-laska said...

first time comment post kak maria. this entry is so WOW. love it :)
barakallahufiki

Unknown said...

Sentiasa lah kita berusaha menadi yang terbaik ! :)

Aliff Haikal said...

SubhanaALlah !

Ana Farhana said...

i understand what was it feel..

love u kak maria ! adore u.. hee

miza&tummy said...

Sy yg org biase2 ni pun susa nak bg org fhm diri yg sbnr...

apatah lagi for the well-known people...

tp lantak lah ape org nak ckp sal kite,selekeh ker,"fotogenik" jek ker (mksudnye kat lua x cntik pun...),mekap tebal ker,giler lens ker..WE HAVE OUR OWN BORDER and PRIVACY kan...

La Zuna Shoppe said...

i've beginning to think that maria elena needs her own space..so maria,have ur own..stop sharing with people..because if u still do,people will think of something about you :) just my 2 cents..

Kak Ezza said...

topik simple sume orang pn tau tapi bila dah baca rasa macam lega. haha. mcm sy yg menaip. keep it up maria! ^^

Anonymous said...

maria!
dont be sad! (=
be yourself! the real u~

anyway, i just love this post. really hope ppl outseide there will stop judging and expecting

we r all human anyway
nobody's perfect
just be happy with own ownself and bersyukur! winks ^^

take care maria!

ilaH said...

salam sis maria.
proudly and well said ! sy just nak cakap , biar org kata apa tentang kita , itu hak mereka. Means ape yg diorang cakap tu akan ubah apa2 ke tentang diri dan hidup kte and all the things revolved around us? No right!
because... in the end its between YOU and Allah that matters the most.

Anonymous said...

well said kak elena. just be yourself

kakzie said...

as salam
tergerak nk komen.no wonder u are famous sis....ramai yg komen kat sini.be yourself and u will be happy.sukses selalu

Ana =) said...

That feeling of how a person loves to expect things well-known but how many of us try to get our best to get rid of it?

Maybe kak maria wrote them now,and we simply woke up from our 'deep sleep' (read : love to expect things) but what about other people? Do they have to write this kind of post too?

Kalolah mereka makan femes ames macam K Maria,mungkin kita ubah persepsi kita pada mereka.Tapi ada orang makan biskut timbang je.

Ahaks~

Dg RaMLaiLasaH FN BraMa said...

aduii..ndaklaa tinggi sangat..pindik seja ko ni.. ( hahaha..ayat kana d hati ni..hehehe)

pikir kool said...

honestly, i think u're famous because of the way u write.

it's like, u're not trying to impress anyone or anything.

ur crazy personality adds to the package i guess. lol

FAIZ HASSAN said...

yeah !

Ini Mashi said...

Thanks 4 the entry kak maria! Nice one... I think this is the most honest and sincere post I've ever read so far... I've learned something from here... thank you!

Unknown said...

a 'from heart' entry. keep being u. never change for others n always believe Allah is always with us.

Erna EER said...

be urself kak maria =) n hirau kn mereka, juz smiling when u hv a prob, =) go go chaayok! luv u. haha

mummy alisha said...

manusia memang begitu...

marlina said...

clap!!! clap!! go on j...

marlina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

very good point of you maria!! nice entry!!

♥ tiah ♥ said...

Thank you sis :)

a said...

salaam maria. this is so very true. an inspiring entry! :)

Dr Zaira said...

i truly understand you because i used to get that at times.

maria, jom kuat sama2!

aween mokhtar said...

Maria..... I find this entry really relatable. Society always expect us to be of certain kind..I don't understand why can't people see past physical and set a default setting while God created us to be different from one another. So what we can do is take the positive things from one another and improve on our flaws.

Keep on writing, you know I'll keep on reading :).

Z.

MIA H said...

expect more on yourself before you expect more from others. :) well said kak maria. love your word and love you too!

Che Lynn said...

Sabar ye dik, this is part and parcel of life la. Biasalah tu, orang ingat dia kenal sangat kita ni but they actually don't. Mana boleh kita nak buat everyone happy, as long as you happy sudah. My advise, masuk telinga kanan keluar telinga kiri, jgn simpan dalam hati.

You take care girl!

Q Partner Travel and Tours said...

kesian kat maria..

anyway semoga yg baik baik sahaja ye

Unknown said...

kesian kat maria..

anyway semoga yg baik baik sahaja ye

Hawa said...

akak nie mesti tgh sedeh kan...
sabar je laaa

Nina Johari said...

sabar maria... be urself! pasal i like u as u are! happy go lucky 24jam! senyum and boh layan ape yg -ve ye! :)
*btw, dah memang u layak jadi femes pun!

XoXO
Nina johari
http://websitenina.blogspot.com/

ainraus said...

me, a silent reader who love you, just yourself. :)

stay crzay, stay pretty, stay selekeh or whatsoever, because you're just a normal lady. wink2. ;)

Nomad Melayu said...

:)

atoyissan said...

maria..I pernah jumpa you masa big bad wolf warehouse sale..time tu hujan lebat gile kita naik satu transport ala..what we call this (yg mcm lori tp dia buat jd bas utk ke parking maep)..mcm bas tu..tp tak sempat nak tegur u sbb waktu tu I lupa mana plak I parking kete..and you tak rendah pon..just nice..lama jugak la baru I perasan..owh tu maria 'peliks' ngeee

Unknown said...

salam..
very nice post akak Maria.
Nanti jadi follower blog baru saya oke.
http://www.perjalanan-hatiku.blogspot.com/

Farisha Fadil said...

yes it's true kak maria. we should be ourselves. in the end, yg penting adalah pandangan Allah terhadap kita. you're right :)

Retail Busana Ukhti said...

visit to http://maris-busana.blogspot.com

Unknown said...

hai kak maria yang cantik dan awesome! akak tau tk da dua kali akak masuk dalam mimpi saya? mungkin sebab saya selalu stalk blog akak kot. hiks! cumil tau :)

none said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
gr@wn said...

yeah, and it sometimes makes us feel more disapproved and alone. And harder to recognize real friend. Even real friend might be not anymore.

think of what we wanna do and go on kan :)

San said...

Salam please take a look :) http://www.facebook.com/pages/Junkie-Closet-PRELOVED/472425362785431

ayut said...

tak dinafikan perasaan tu.yg tak dikenali pon rasa mcm tak best je kalau ada yg expect2 ni lg kalau org kenal.takpela.doa yg terbaik.nobody yg lbh knal sape kita kecuali kita dan Allah.

baik..mualaf memerlukan bimbingan.insya Allah.kita bantu bersama bila berjumpa mereka k :)

Chenta said...

tabah k,k.maria.i will support you.............!!!

Sutji Decilya said...

Semangat.. Manusia bertahan dari kritik orang sekitar.

edlina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
edlina said...

salam, ive read ur entry before yg u ckp u xbaca all these comments in ur blog because u cont want to get hurt, i nak jugak komen sbb i'm so touched with ur writing sista.. i am admirer you from here ;') love..

Cromirama Elcy said...

Selamat Menunaikan Ibadah Puasa.

Islamic Inspirations said...

Asalamu alaikum

TERRITORY said...

i love reading ur blog!..and watching ur vlog is like a daily routine for me..tapi I tak obses la,i suke u punye cara u yang sempoi..but know what, leave alone the haters...masih ramai yang suke you for who u are..maybe i tak kenal u,but then i istill like because u are so ORIGINAL!...keep on spreading and sharing good messages to the people elena!..:)

wanie-ladybird said...

so tru dek...
bukan senang nk puaskan hati smua org..bykkan bersabar k

Sabar said...

Sabar doakan semoga maria tabah menghadapinya..
ada baiknya entri ni supaya menjadi teguran dan ingatan terutama pada Sabar sendiri..