Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Sabar

Assalamualaikum wbt

confession: i am quite an impatient person.
when i dig deep within myself, i found that the thing i hate most, is waiting. no matter what form.
sometimes when waiting gets to my nerves, i get angry.
and when i'm angry, astaghfirullahalazim..

it's very disappointing.
i used to ask myself "why is it that you can change your outlook, change your lifestyle and whatnot, but you can't be patient and control your temper?" everytime after i've done something stupid because i was too impatient. that's the thing about me. i know i need to chill, to sabar and calm down, but the next time, the same cycle will happen again.

Allah Maha Adil.
He knows i am an impatient person, so He tests me by letting me handle the most impatient client. i felt harassed almost everyday by the number of calls, emails and texts that i almost always lost my temper. since i can't just throw my tantrum at work (don't want my colleagues and bosses to think i'm unprofessional), i let it out by throwing rocks, slamming my car door (as if that helps! pfft), and what's worse, sometimes, i would let some cursing slip off of my tongue after talking or replying my client's email.
in hopes that it could make me feel better.
it doesn't and never did. but i do it anyway =\

then one day, not long ago, i did solat jemaah isyak in a masjid near my workplace. on the second rakaat, the imam's mic's volume went lower and lower thus causing the imam to recite the surahs louder so that we could all hear him. but i couldn't hear him anyway.. 'cause of that, my mind started to wander. i started thinking about the most random things and then suddenly i realised the imam dah rukuk. so of course i followed. then i thought to myself, "ya Allah, sorry ek.. apasal la i tak kuat iman ni.. i hope You can wait for me (to be beriman enough)".

it was like a tight slap given across my face as i stood for qiyam..

how dare i.. how dare i ask Allah swt to wait for me, whereas i couldn't even wait for others?
how can i ask Allah, The Almighty, to be patient with me, when i can't with others?
how dare i ask Allah, The Giver of Life and Giver of Death, to wait for me to be a better person, as if i'm the one who gets to decide when i want to die?

i cried while praying that time.
and when i read Surah Al-fatihah, fresh tears streamed down my face.

Surah Al- fatihah:

Bismillahirrahmanirahim (In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful)
Alhamdulillahi rabbil 'aalamin (All praise and thanks are Allah's, the Lord of the Alamin - mankind, jinn & all that exists)
Ar-rahman ir-raheem (The Most Gracious, the Most Merciful)
Maaliki yawm id-deen (The Only Owner (and the Only Ruling Judge) of the Day of Recompense)
Iyaaka na'budu waiyaka nasta'een (You (alone) we worship, and You (alone) we ask for help - for each and everything)
Ihdina ssirat al-mustaqeem (Guide us to the Straight Way)
Siraat alladheena an'amta 'alayhim, ghairil maghdoobi 'alayhim wa lad-daleen (The Way of those on whom you have bestowed Your Grace, not the way of those who earned Your Anger, nor of those who went astray)
Ameen.

my life could be taken away whenever He pleases, and there i was, asking Him to wait.
"how dare you.." i kept saying to myself.. indeed. how dare me..

i'm sharing this side of me which i'm ashamed of to those of you reading this.. and i'm sharing it because i know there are some people who share this same problem. we're only human. we make mistakes, and we're far from perfect. but it's time to change.. we'll never know if we have a 'tomorrow'.

so here's my new year's resolution. instead of a list of things that i want to do, i only have one thing that i need to do.

i need to be patient.

to be patient when doa, performing prayers, listening to others, eating, executing tasks, basically everything and anything. insyAllah.. 

Surah Al-Imran (3:120);
"..But if you remain patient and become Al-Muttaqun (the pious), not the least harm will their cunning do to you."

Surah Hud (11:115);
"And be patient, verily, Allah wastes not the reward of the good-doers."


Guide us to the Straight Way

88 comments:

.kiddo. said...

me too..what i hate most is waiting,kak maria .

Suraya Aris said...

Allah maha penyayang, kadang2 kita tak sedar, kita nak doa kita dimakbulkan dengan cepat, tapi apa yang Dia suruh, tak pulak kita buat dengan cepat =(

echa takashimaya said...

yes! sabar.it's da word to be more positive.insyallah :)

alice said...

may we change for the better, InsyaAllah :)

cerkLeng said...

sabar itu separuh drp iman... =))

スマイル fzdllh. said...

good luck!
insyaAllah, jom belajar bersabar! :)

Honey Kumicky said...

cepat je marah bila hilang sabar..nga blaja kawal emosi..

syabab said...

sabar uh mang benda yg susah especially sabar ketika org sedang menyakiti kita..huhuh..

NorHalizah said...

byk kn bsabar k =D

.::TAIKO ::. said...

sis..nk share vid ni
jmp kat youtube..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=xGn2N0lmTH8&NR=1

ZYASH said...

sabar itu separuh daripada iman...

Aneesah said...

MashaAllah. :) Feel free to write more like this, Maria, with the intention to invite others to good too, inshaAllah.

Nak share one old Tumblr post about patience: http://aneesahs.tumblr.com/post/11904353377/therefore-o-believer

nurul saadah said...

insyaallah kak maria boleh :))

erleena said...

:(

nurul saadah said...

insyaallah kak maria boleh :))

annie abd ghani said...

Kak maria.. It does happen to me too~ Often.. especially the waiting part.. sob3x.. menusuk kalbu post ni~ Thanks for the sharing! :)insaf sekejap...
Nice post!

girl with NO title said...

me totally hte waitin n then lose temper then bd mood =,=' but i can control it by mking my masam face hee, oh ya this post really mnginsafkn :'(

nasyrah ash said...

subhanallah, was just thinking about 'i always forget that i could die anytime' and poof, this blogpost. thank you :)jazakillah.

Mr feckry said...

bergantung pada Allah..rase la dengan jujur, penuh nikmat..inysa Allah

sheera said...

sabar ye kak maria

shafiq zulhilmi said...

thanks for the post akak maria. never thought ada orang yang rasa what saya rasa. ketenangan lepas dah lame tak solat jemaah. :)

Waniey Shop said...

InsyaAllah :)

Nabila Zainudin said...

i loves your sincere writing ,
I am also hate waiting , but wanted or not , i have to . So , while waiting , i also some benefit stuff , like 'berzikir' or reading . Besides that , take out any of your gadget like mp3<----- even though , its already outdated but its really entertaining . By doing that , its really helps me , to handle my stress while waiting someone .

Nurul Mazni Sawal said...

thanks utk peringatan ni sis.. at least sy beringat yang kita ni bukanlah manusia yang ckup sempurna.. sentiasa buat silap.. tapi still kite meminta yang baik2 dari allah sedangkan kita dengan manusia pun tak mampu nk buat baik.. anyway thanks again.. u have the same problem with me.. i cant bear to waiting for someone else.. :) but i will try to bear with it this time..

~cik atin~ said...

bukan senang org yang baran tok jadi seorang yg penyabar (",)

HuneySugar♥♥ said...

Hehe saya pown ade prob in controlling my temper. kdg2 rse malu sbb bnda remeh temeh pown boley marah. Not nice sbnarnye pmpuan marah. Hehe peace :D

zuhair said...

thanks for sharing the thought kak maria :)

najwa's said...

keep on istiqomah dear~ :)

ridiculously me said...

salam,,
reading this,,feels like an older sister giving advice to her younger sis *not saying u're old or anything here tehee* can totally relate to this eventhough mine is my temper rather than my patience huhu so,,keep it up,,loving it! (:

Me As My Self said...

hm... nice best bace tntg keimann yg timbul rakan yg lain (benar2) .. sbb sesuatu yg org lain, bkan org lain lah tp diri sendiri, tau x mgkin setiap org tu berbeza kan tapi allah letakkan kita pada satu tahap yg mana kita sendiri akan understnd why its happend... & always put in my n also yours that ALLAH adalah maha-segalanya

ramona said...

may Allah guide u always..limpahkan hidayah pada u and us..n mitk2 Allah tak palingkan kita dari kebenaran once hidayah tu dah diberi..

:)

Zaini said...

hey i hope this'll help,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTWn8CSM7Vw

congratz on the engagement btw. lucky lad!

Dari sudut Hati kecilku said...

indeed

Riena Haiqal said...

dalam hidup kita perlu sabar... kerna sabar itu separuh dari iman..saya juga seorang yang sangat2 panas baran, tetapi try untuk sabar dan terus sabar...

Azham Vosovic said...

Amin insyaallah...all the best to you Maria :)

My Aisy said...

thanks...kekadang kita sendiri tak perasan pe yang kita wat...

Bashtiah said...

thanks for sharing this side of you :')

20 cent said...

"Dan baikilah (dengan sebaik-baiknya segala usaha) perbuatan kamu, sesungguhnya Allah mengasihi orang yang berusaha memperbaiki amalannya." (al-Baqarah 2;195)

one.shah said...

Alhamdulillah..a great post to share Maria..

Tg fatin said...

I did have same problem with you before, impatient.it's something really difficult to manage but Allah will help you as long as you believe in Allah..Allah will test you in many ways, in order to see your determination in keeping your words..So,keep your iman in preparation and face all the problems coming, with a strong heart. I know you can face all those things and will pray for your success, insya Allah..Take care of your iman..^_^

nashuaahmad said...

tersentuh baca entri ni...manusia..tak penah sempurna..tapi manusia sebena nya mampu untuk elakkan kejahatan,,,bergantung pada diri kita sendiri..terima ksih kak maria..terima kasih atas kesedaran ni... =(

Natasha said...

may Allah bless us, inshaAllah (:

chaotic_eiLa said...

salam....
sy suke lh everytink yg akak post kat dlm blog nih...blh d jadi kn panduan..hihi
sy suke sgt2 the way akak berckp..terutamanya yg akak slalu post dkt u tube tu...funny gler..sy x habiz2 gelak smapai x hingat dunia..ahaha..n d sebalik video2 akak yg funny2 tu terselit sesuatu yg bergune gak..suke sgt2..akak bwat lh bebyk post video..hihi...

me^is^fara said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Twiggy said...

May Allah bless you for this beautiful post that serves as a great reminder to us all

Gadis Gingsul said...

insya Allah maria boleh, bila da niat...bismillah

mimiomar said...

Ya Allah..indahnye kalau dapat rase ape yg k.maria rase.. Jahil sgguh saye. sy sbagai sorg muslimah bangga dgn k.maria. May Allah bless you.

k e y r i said...

:)

shirahime said...

sobs. sobs. my temper is worse than yours. i try to control it by reading books (Don't Be Sad etc), bykkn selawat & istighfar. be around those who are positives helps too. my friends helps me a lot. =)

NuYu said...

hai maria...i follow ur blog taw..btway..u nice sweet jer i tgk walau pon never meet ur la dear...suke tgk ur scarfls :)..join buleh hihi

btway jom la join blog i http://nurullovebeauty-nuyu.blogspot..

afiqah.khalid said...

ur post answer my curiosity towards something. thats why solat is the 2nd thing we must do after syahadah. Subhanallah.

heart's chronicles said...

assalamualaikum kak maria.
http://wanwma.com/agama/sabar-itu-cantik/

sabar itu cute..you know.hehe..^_^

#sama sama cari keredhaan dan hidayah ALLAH,insyaALLAH..

LynN LoLa~~ said...

kak maria cantik!

sebelum ni lynn tak pernah view ur video on utube. but once i tgok. i cannot stop myself laughing. u r just soo being u. n i like it. i dont understand why other people hate u. *based on comments i saw on utube*

btw, back to ur entry, sabar itu indah. lynn pon tak penyabar. tp jom berusaha jadi seorang yg penyabar :) thumbs up kak maria

Alia Syaza :) said...

insyaallah boleh kak maria. ameen :)

Cha said...

Same goes to me, Maria

sometimes it is too hard to control our temper but at least we should try to be a better person in future.

kan bersabar itu separuh dari iman

♥e'in♥ said...

sabar kak..

lomoisgood said...

kak maria!could u do me a favor?
promote this video pleaze...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9riTBf_k8ws

we made it for lisa surihani,but we cant reach her.
tq! :D

mu'minah said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mimi azila said...

kak maria cantik !
byk2 sabar okay .
entry ni paling tenang and sedappppppp sgt baca :)

mohdhazlan Dreadlock said...

sbr sbhgian drp iman..

LaiLa said...

We all have that moments when we fell we can't wait, we're so tired of waiting, I think. But your doing good asking Allah to make you be more patient, keep doing it, and InshaAllah you'll see how finally you're becoming patient, InshaAllah

HUgs!

Gadis-Semasa said...

hai akak . gadis semasa cme nk ckap best sgt post yg ni .

Eddy said...

You're an amazing person kak maria! You should find an usrah group.. It helps me a lot, especially knowing that there are other girls who want to be better muslims and doing it together is more fun and easier without being so "ustazah-like" you know?

Ima Amalina said...

true much:)

SyazwanSarawak said...

"good things, come to those who wait"
I enjoyed this post :)

lisa said...

sometimes by waiting our friends to reply our texts can easily make us angry or maybe..sulking *-*

love this post :)

aten said...

kak maria, ape yg akak tulis nie same macam sy rase.. im impatient person too. boleh sy copy entry blog akak buat simpan2 tuk bace2 mase lapang coz, i use to go cc bile nak on9... rumah takde internet.. pless...

Che Armad said...

Isu Semasa : 2012... Hari Kiamat terus diramal... Fenomena ribut matahari terjadi pada pertengahan 2012 hingga 2013...

Rujuk Entri ini:
http://che-armad.blogspot.com/2012/01/isu-semasa-2012-hari-kiamat-terus.html

Che Armad said...

Isu Semasa : 2012... Hari Kiamat terus diramal... Fenomena ribut matahari terjadi pada pertengahan 2012 hingga 2013...

Rujuk Entri ini:
http://che-armad.blogspot.com/2012/01/isu-semasa-2012-hari-kiamat-terus.html

ctahmars said...

:)

cut amir said...

:) patient.

kHaiRunNisSa iRnA said...

tau x elaun cola da naik rm 500??

http://ummijournal.blogspot.com/2012/01/elaun-cola-naik-rm-500-yeay.html

Sr. Maryam Fatanah said...

Kak Maria, u inspired me !...i also am such an impatient person n yeah u r rite..allah always test me with such people..apa2 pun lets berusaha to be more patient person..May Allah guide us

Ahmad Ali (bukan nama sebenar) said...

sabar la kak dan terus bersabar

follow la aku ngeh2

Narcolepsy said...

Ayah saya selalu pesan, Nabi SAW pernah bersabda
"Orang yang paling kuat adalah orang yang mampu menahan marah" au kama qal

Kita sama ja. Tp susah amat nk tahan marah. It takes years to train. T_T

Sakura Shawl said...

hi dear...ingat akak lagi tak? dear, akak ade letak gmbar time event Reflection kt blog ..jemput singgah ye :)www.sakurashawl.com

Ahmad Ali (bukan nama sebenar) said...

kelass kauu maria .
please ajo aku speaking :(

amal said...

"seseorang itu tak dikurniakan suatu pemberian yg lebih baik & lebih luas daripada sabar."- Riwayat Al-Bukhari

Captain Jet said...

Also my new year resolution *high five* Haha..

I can't stand traffic jam.. I'd curse at the motorists, at the drivers, at the passer by, at the policemen. Then astaghfirullah...

Allah is also testing me by making me work with an impatient and short tempered bosses..in my previous and current company.... which I dislike. Finally it made me realise that I am disliking MYSELF. That I myself is no better than them.

So now I am trying my best to control my temper, my impatient. It's bizarre -__-

pikir kool said...

8:66 "Sekarang Allah telah meringankan kepadamu dan Dia telah mengetahui bahwa padamu ada kelemahan..."

AyuAdzum said...

Muhasabah diri when you know that your attitude is not rite..I like that attitude of yours..:)

Farah Nabilah said...

i think this is my first time comment something on your blog hihi :)but i wanna thank you for posting entries that can make your reader gain something, good things, which in return, you'll gain something also, insyaAllah :)
anyway, just wanna share one thing here related to patient. you know, in the Day of Judgement kan, there will be a group of people that will be given syafaat (help) to enter the heaven WITHOUT DIHISAB (sorry lah manglish sikit :B) when they wanna enter the heaven, the malaikat will ask them utk pergi dihisab first,but they will say no, they have been given the syafaat to enter the heaven without dihisab and the malaikat ask, WHO ARE YOU?
"the one who has patient" they replied.
tapi kalau tak silap, dlm hadis sahih, sejumlah 72,000 org yg akn dpt syafaat ini. wallahua'lam :)

ayarasmin said...

hi maria,

like this entry.suka sangat.

minta izin nak copy surah al-fatihah tuh.nak letak kat belog.nak share.

boleh?

cik tyqah said...

as a muslim kt kene bnyk2 bersabar...is a shame what we can do when kt hilng sabr...

Amy Z! said...

Assalamualaikum wbt.
I cry as I read this entry. Its kinda slap at my head~

Thank you for sharing this as reminder to myself.

May Allah bless you.

miss nina said...

true indeed. may Allah bless us.
good post maria :)

Sweet Sailor Wifey said...

U really touch me in this post.....I'm a mualaf for 8yrs but recently only I'm realize I need to transform myself to be a better muslimah..... Going through a hard path..... Patient really need in this transformation.....

aidayusni said...

Ya Allah..I cried. Thank you sis for this wake-up call..allahuakbar