so it was your birthday and i did not buy you any presents because i simply cannot find anything that you would like. let's face it ma, you've gotzz itzz allzzzzz!
a house, otw.
handbags berlambak sampai almari jatuh.
boys yang besar macam giants.
a hubby yang kuat tido.
a daughter yang sebijik macam father dia. kuat tido. tapi workaholic. dan awesome.
for the past 23years plus of my life, i know i've been a happy child. but at the same time, i know i annoy the hell out of you.
i likez to cubitz your pipiz.
i like to sing out loud in the car with my sengaja-dibuatkan-suara-buruk-gila to annoy everyone.
i like to make faces at you when you're trying to be serious. to annoy you, of course.
i like to answer "tanak" when you ask "ena boleh tolong.." laju laju before you finish your sentence. to annoy you, of course. but i always do it anyway kan maaaaaa! =B
i like to gigit gigit your arms while making sounds yang pelik pelik.
annnnnnnnnnnnddddddddd ssssssssoooooooooooooo much more.
you know lah kan.
i wanted to give a toast at dinner yesterday (bajet american style la kan) but i just can't. i know if i start talking serious, i would either cry, or make stupid faces to immediately change the mood.
so i write this out for you ok?
mother, i know i've been the least helpful at home. i've been living far from home since after school up till today.
but now that i'm not that far from you, i often go home on weekends to be with you and the family because i dearly miss that. what i miss most about home, is you =)
when i come home and you're not there, i always thought "lebih baik tak balik. cis." but i stayed anyway sebab rumah ada astro. hehe!
i enjoy talking to you, and sharing stories with you. you're my only girrrpreeennn at home!
ma, remember when we were in Portobello road? i was separated from you and the family. i can't call out because i don't have roaming. it was raining hard then too. i remember how scared i was. ye lah, how can i go back? how to find all of you in a sea of crowd? i was completely clueless! then i just called you out in my heart. i prayed that i will see you.
and i did.
i saw you.
i always have this ESP thingy with you. =)
you always listen to the boys and me complain about our lives and we hardly ever hear yours.
i remember i used to complain about how studying is so difficult. and you just kept giving me advices and encouraging me that "it's normal to feel like that. memang susah apa you tengah buat."
now that i'm working, i realised that studying is like eleeeehhh! small matter je stress dia!
working is a whole load of stress. tension. eye straining looking at the computer screen wondering how to solve a problem.
baru i tau..
how hard it must had been for you to raise us while you were working, to pick us up from school and feed us with good food everyday, to suppress your hopes and dreams for the sake of raising us, your setan kids.
how hard it must (still) be for you to clean our rooms, wash our clothes, iron and fold them, and feed us everyday..
and yet, you don't complain.
you do make remarks about us being lazy and 'anak tak guna', but you still do what you do. you support us, you listen and you make us feel loved. you accept us the way we are, even when we're at our 'bad' phase. you always tell us to know our limits without ever telling us what the limits were.
but somehow rather, we know it anyway.
you've done so much for us.
and i wish i know how to repay you.
insyallah ma, in future, i will do what's necessary for you and abah.
and that will be my gift to you. for all the years you've sacrificed for us. =)
you're the best, mom. you're my inspiration. you're my strength.
i love you so much, mother. i always pray that i can make you proud.
i hope along the way, i have.
Ena da Lena.