Why I English

 Assalamualaikum~

Rasa lama je tak blogging.

Anyway, haritu i ada buat video kat tiktok, and it suddenly gained so much traction. I was so flabbergasted sebab i just nak share story i je, pastu sebab instagram cam banyak songeh, i guna je la tiktok…

Haih…

Whatever la kan…

Comments! While i was talking about a current issue, based on my experience, a lot of people were commenting about:

1. How they had watched my youtube videos back then, and are currently in their late 20s to mid 30s 😂😂

I couldn’t comment to everyone, so in case you’re reading my blog for the sake of reminiscing, Thank You, for your support back then, and now 😄 And let’s grow better together, inshaAllah~

2. How i was using/speaking too much english…

I guess i do. I would say i’m more of a Melanglish (Melayu + english) speaker, and more of an english writer.

Why?

Because, i speak mostly to my family; ie my children and husband. Based on my observation, why myself (and my family) are heavily on the english speaking side is because of what we consume visually & audibly.

For example, i read a lot of english materials, like news, novels, articles, and when i want to learn about something, a lot of the videos are in english, whether it’s about Islam, about how to fix something, cooking… not to say there’s no melayu contents that are beneficial. Ada je.

In terms of speaking, my BM ok je, cuma bila dalam setting formal, my english is better. Kalau nak formal-talk dalam BM, mungkin slow sikit sebab kurang praktis. I suka dengar Ikim.fm bila tengah drive (average dalam 2 jam sehari), dan cara diorang bercakap tu, i suka. Relax, clear, dan ada pengisian. Hari tu dengar pasal Lembaga Zakat Selangor cerita pasal golongan asnaf, ada pasal Halal, ada cara masak, macam-macam la! Sangat bagus & highly recommended 👍 (tetibe)

Walaupun i more english speaking & writing, tak bermaksud i tak sayang bahasa ibunda kita. Tak langsung. Bila i belajar bahasa korea, i punya appreciation untuk bahasa kita melonjak-lonjak kot sebab i faham kenapa orang cakap bahasa adalah legacy. Bahasa kita sangat colourful, flexible, senang nak faham, dan bolehubah. Air boleh jadi ayaq, keluar boleh jadi kelik. 

It’s my bad la i tak praktis BM lebih. I should. 

So yeah.

Tu je la.

Short update

 Adehh…

Terdelete the comments on my blog 😑

I only wanted to delete the spams, pastu terdelete all the recent comments. So kalau you’ve commented on my blogposts and don’t see them anymore… it’s not on purpose and please don’t take offence 🙌 Sorry!

I rasa lately ni i macam all over the place, all at once. Huhu…

It’s disgusting kan, what isnajis has been doing and how they keep getting away with it.How can this whole society, the whole “country” with about 10 million people in it, be supportive of rapi*ts? Siap defending them! Calling them heroes?!? 💩

Takleh brain. 

Dah tu, kat our own country pun macam macam kes. With the missing people cases, abuses and etc… Takut la wei!

I kept wondering, what am i supposed to do? But nothing comes in mind. All i can do is pray to Allah to help the mujahids, protect us and be grateful for all the blessings i have. 

That said, let’s pray that the mujahids are not only those who are fighting with their might, but they are also those who are fighting in the political world, fighting for justice behind the public’s knowledge, wherever they are.

May Allah protect us.

May Allah protect our country.

May Allah protect Islam.

May Allah send his armies to protect these political fighters, keep their hearts clean and save them from any form of harm, whether it is bribery, slander, blackmail and more.

Free Palestine! Keep boycotting as if it’s your jihad. Keep sharing about Palestine and pray for their freedom as if they’re your families. 💪

We may be powerless, but a small action does not go unnoticed by Allah SWT.

InshaAllah, may Allah accept it. Amiin~

Palestinians in Malaysia

 Bukan Palestinians saje, Syrian pun ada, Iraqis pun ada, Afghan pun ada.

They’re seeking refuge in our country. Malaysia.

@mikhailhanafi made a great video explaining the refugee situation in our country. Go watch it HERE.

Here’s the brief summary + my own experience:

1. Malaysia tak bagi rights to refugees. No rights to self determine (work), no rights to education, and healthcare.

2. I wrote about my experience back in 2015, and i’ve also personally talked to NGOs (MSRI being one of them), and some amazing people who have been helping refugees residing in our country, like Pichaeats, and i had also worked with some refugees back when i had La Kayena and Marzea, and my conclusion is Malaysia punya UNHCR tak function. Takde la 100% tak function, tapi they can’t change the policy of allowing refugees basic human right. The UN card basically has no function.

3. FYI, our country tak serap masuk refugees because our country is a transit. Basically means that the refugees are only allowed to stay in Malaysia while UN find them a country that will take them in. Usually it’s Australia, Canada, US… 

4. These refugees thought of coming to Malaysia sebab apa tau… while their neighbouring countries are also not completely helpful, they thought Malaysia, being a muslim country, kind, accepting, and cared for them, would be better than the mat salleh genocide-supporter countries. Indah khabar dari rupa.

5. Since they cannot work legally, they have to work illegally and secretly because our police love detaining them, it seems. There were many cases where men and women had been detained for weeks to months, because they were caught selling food, forcing them to leave their kids behind. To be let out of detainment center, they have to pay fine. Mana nak dapat duit kalau keje pun takleh?

Understand this: they cannot work kan. Most of them come here in families. You know, with spouse, children. So, without any income, they are dependent on UNHCR for ‘allowance’ which is little, considering they have to pay for RENT, BILLS, SCHOOL (if their kids dapat masuk school for refugees), MAKAN, MINUM, kalau sakit, CLINIC + MEDS… 

And here’s another thing… some of them come to our country with only the clothes on their backs. Their documents, certificates, licenses, are mostly gone. Understand that they had no idea that their lives were going to turn upside down, that they were going to lose their homes, livelihood, their families, and more.

So how?

I remember seeing videos of the local people maki-maki orang arab yang jual balloons, food, etc. Ada yang cakap diorang ni “menyemak”. Orang rohingya pun kena gak. (Jap, jap… sabar ye readers…)

Astaghfirullah al-azim…

Sebab tak kena kat batang hidung sendiri, orang Malaysia mencaci-caci diorang. The thing is, they are desperate. Hidup diorang penuh dengan anxiety. Can you imagine being in their shoes?

I believe those who can’t imagine la yang kuat mencaci tu. They don’t understand the refugees’ unfortunate circumstances. Dah la they are forcefully and brutally pushed out of their own homes, then when seeking help from their neighbours, they were only met with rejection. And worst of all, the people rejecting them are also the people who seemingly showed empathy for the oppressed. Isn’t that twisted? 

When a person is desperate to survive, they’d do anything even if it’s wrong. Ye, i am very aware of how parasitic they’ve been btw (the rohingyas, i mean)… but then, if the roles’ reversed, mungkin i pun buat camtu kan. Who knows 😕 Takut nak assume i’m ‘different’.

Honestly, i hate seeing how two-faced we truly are. Our government, and ourselves (i’m including myself here, fyi).

We claim to be so nice…

I believe that we should just allow them to work here legally. Let the kids go to school. Let them assimilate and then contribute to our economy. Maybe if there’s a better way for them to survive kat negara kita for a while? Just until they have their country back or when UN found them a permanent place to live. I’m sure there must be someone doing a study about this huhu…

However, the underlying problem, which had been for decades, is that our own locals pun tak boleh nak fully assimilate based on differences in culture, religion, language. We tolerate each other really well, though, but it’s not enough.

Remember this letter?

The will of the Palestinian child, Mohammad Abdel Qader Al-Husseini, found after his martyrdom: 

“My will to you:
If I die, depart, and become martyred in the war,

I will not forgive all the Arab rulers who betrayed us.
We lived through difficult days, without food or drink, and the siege has grayed my hair despite my young age.
May God not forgive you or pardon you.
I swear I will complain about you to the Creator of the seven heavens.

Forgive me, my mother, I love you very much. Do not be sad about my departure.

My message to the people of Egypt, Yemen, Jordan, Algeria, Libya, Lebanon, Tunisia, Sudan, Somalia, and Malaysia:
I entrust you (please), do not leave Gaza alone.
I entrust you, do not forget Gaza.
I urge you and entrust you with this.
I love you all very much... Please do not let us down.

Anyone who finds my message, I entrust you to share it.

I am the martyr, God willing: 

Mohammad Abdel Qader Al-Husseini.”

I cried so hard reading this.

Because it’s an amanah that i can’t promise i can fulfil. How can i not let them down when i can’t even do anything for the ones who fled here, in my country, well within my reach?

They know us, our country, they praise us for being on their side, and yet…

You see how hypocritical the situation is? While the refugees lost their homes, belongings, money, their heritage, legacies, and all because of zionists, our own people boleh pulak bawak cicak najis tu ke sini bagi talk and whatnots. To make it all salty and bitter, they’re here so comfortably. Bab* betul.

When will the suffering end for the refugees? Most importantly… the refugees ni, diorang tanak pun duduk negara lain. Diorang nak duduk tempat dia jugak. If only the satanists stop bombi*g everything, and murder*ng people…

I have many more gripes about our bajet-hero-attitude. But i should stop here.

My only hope is that your perspective changes, even if it’s a little bit, on how you see refugees in our country. I also hope that Malaysia would truly be a country that is free from the influences of Zionists, have a strong backbone, and united during difficult times.

May Allah help the survivors of genocides, may Allah provide for them, protect them and raise their ranks in Jannah. May Allah allow us to berjihad on His Path, that our jihad is honest and sincere, and accepted by Him. May Allah allow us to help those in need. May Allah clean our hearts from sifat kedekut dan berkira. May Allah save Palestine. May Allah save the ummah.

Amiiin…

Ps: sorry for being kinda emotional but this was something i had tried fighting for… it was one of the things that made me realise that i wasn’t as ‘influential’ as i thought i was. I thought being an ‘influencer’ meant my voice was heard. The reality is my voice was only a billboard, a space for advertising, for money. My voice couldn’t change a situation, a condition. Huhu… tetibe…

A book of Mine

 Ekhem..

Ekceli...

For 2 years now, i have been writing and editting a book. My book. A book written by me.

It started because... Saje je. I had an idea and i wanted to go with it. And i went with it until recently.

It was an arduous journey. I had no experience in writing a book, but i have been an avid reader, a blogger, a caption-er (i used to write lengthy captions on IG...), so it shouldn't be that hard - was what i thought. Until i did it.

It is definitely not easy. It is so tedious, requires planning, plotting and everything i never knew!

But alhamdulillah, i think it's ok la. Kot.

My daughter did the illustration heheee 😁

Like i said, this book was in the works 2 years ago, a year in writing, a year in editting.

Gila la.

If you're bored, and want to read this amateur's work, please go to this link.

Chasing the White Maddoz

It's free, and i will be uploading a few chapters at a time.

If you want to leave a comment, sila kan. If not, it's ok also 😌

So nervous uhukkkkkk

As always, please keep Palestine in your doas, boycott all you can, and donate if you can.

I hope Isnajis and their supporters and providers will face their consequences asap.

The ongoing genocide needs to end and the occupation needs to be demolished!

I don't believe in 2 state solution. Not with crazy psychopathic isnajises who are worse than animals.

Palestine is the only state we all recognize!

May Allah grant the Palestinians liberation, accept the dead as syahids, give strength, resilience, comfort, support and more to the survivors, and destroy the enemies, humiliate and expose everyone who were directly involved in the genocide.

May Allah forgive us if ever we were complicit unintentionally and intentionally, may Allah accept our doas and the Palestinians, the orphans, the widows, the ones suffering and losing spirit. 

May victory be for the mujahids, for the Palestinians. 

Amiiin...

Kisah Boycott: To do it, or not

 I was listening to Ikim fm this morning, and they were discussing about boycott. (I can’t believe after 7 months we still need convincing whether to do it or not…)

I couldn’t listen to it fully since i was driving, and reached my destination before it even got to the conclusion.

Now.

Here’s my POV and understanding. 

Dalam kisah Mekdi, why i boycott is:

1) it’s not healthy & highly addictive

2) even though it is owned by Saudi’s company/Gerbang Alaf, halal, employed many Malaysians, they pay zakat and donated to Palestine cause, the major shareholders of McD, are the 4 most notorious-money-hungry investors: Vanguard, Blackrock, State Street & JPMorgan.

Who are they?

Takyah tengok semua. Tengok SATU pun cukup, inshaAllah.

Blackrock.

Blackrock invests in weapons manufacturers, military contractors, and more, that has been murdering Palestinians, Yemenis, Iraqis, Afghans, Syrians.

Yes. 

One of the companies that they’re investing in is non-other than Lockheed Martin. 

Lockheed Martin tu sape? 

They are the largest weapons manufacturer, and have been supplying IsNAJIS with F-16 and F-35 fighter jets that has bombing Gaza, C-130 Hercules transport planes to support ground invasion of Gaza, AGM-114 Hellfire missiles for the Apache helicopters that has been dropping missiles over the people in Gaza!

*vomit*

Dalam kisah KFC pulak, why i boycott is:
1) Mahal
2) Yes, halal, employed many Malaysians etc etc… Their largest shareholders are Yum! Brands and Vanguard. Yum Brands ni is an investor of Isnajis companies. 

Yum also investor of Pizza Hut… They made an advert, mocking the Palestinians hostages (they call them prisoners but we know Palestinians were captured and jailed for no reason) for going on a hunger strike.

Oh, btw, Vanguard & Blackrock sekufu ye.

I’m not sure which one’s owned the other, tapi diorang ni sinonim la.

You faham tak?

You see who we’re dealing with here?

All these fast food chains that ‘comes from Amerika’, ‘owned by local companies’, while i applaud their ethics and opportunities they have been providing, sedikit sebanyak pergi kat these MFs.

Even if it’s satu sen, satu je pun, i’m not ok with that.

That being said, i takde la nak force anyone to participate.

I just don’t think it’s equivalent.

A Happy Meal to make a kid full, means a kid is being murdered in Gaza. And it’s not just Mekdi, Kepci, Coca cola, it’s the whole thing.

You can read here if you want to see who are profitting from the genocide.

This. “Franchisor often receives payment for providing training, equipment, or business advisory services… the franchisor receives ongoing royalties or a percentage of the operation’s sales.”

In case you’re wondering how the money goes to murderers.

All in all, I know i boycott bukan sebab emosi melulu. I do my research. I understand. And i will try my best to istiqamah. I have seen so many articles saying Malaysians ni boycott sebab kita ni Pro-Palestine sahaja. NO! It’s not ONLY because we’re Pro-Palestine! We are anti GENOCIDE. Then ada la yang cakap “habis genocide kat XYZ tu? Why ignore that?”. NO! No one’s ignoring that too. But to end all genocides, we need to successfully end the root cause of it: ISRA—L! The father of all setans. 

I boycott because i don’t want to make the contributor to the genocide get anything out of me, and i certainly won’t support those who are pro-isnajis. It’s not complicated.

In terms of livelihood, I get it, though.

It’s hard to get a job nowadays, so not many have the opportunity to choose where they can work.

Tapi kita ni jauh lebih kaya, lebih senang, lebih segala-galanya daripada diorang kat Gaza tu…

The faith of the people in Gaza while facing uncertainties, fear of being targeted & killed, after losing everything is far greater than ours. 

We know, Allah is Maha Kaya, Allah is Fair, Allah is our Provider, and to put our trust in Him. 

May Allah provide for those who chose to stand for what they believe is right, may Allah bukakan pintu-pintu rezeki untuk semua, may Allah accept our small acts as jihad.

Amiiin..

Pasal mekdi kan… i bukan apa… dia nak sue the BDS, padahal i rasa dia patut sue Mekdi Isnajis sebab diorang yang buat palat. They should sue the isnajis franchise for the cause of sales drop, jatuhkan air muka, and do it ‘in their name’. Condemn the Isnajis punya actions secara terang-terangan, and then, perhaps then i would feel more supportive of gerbang alaf. 

If the local workers in these pro-isnajis companies sanggup, fight the upper managements to divest, and to make a clear statement that they cut or don’t have any ties with isnajis, just like how the staff in Google are fighting with their own company to stop Project Nimbus, and university students are protesting with their universities to divest. They didn’t leave their institutions, but they fought within them.

Yu naur?

Also, it’s high time we build and grow our own local brands and stuff. Local FTW!

Oh, i use these Boycott apps:

Sebenarnya ada banyak lagi nak cite, tapi setakat ni je la. Next post, maybe.

Malahah

 Selamat Hari Raya~

Maaf Zahir & Batin~ Batin especially sebab my online existence is easier to access than physical...

Ehek.

My daughter ni, she likes to say "malaha", which is "malas la" yang dimalaskan lagi. 

"You need to do your homework straight away. That day itself kena buat so that dia tak pile up banyak", said me or husband. We sometimes nag about the same things. 

"Ughh.. malaha", she would say.

😓

I also don't know how to raise a tween... May Allah give her hidayah, and give us patience 👐

The other day, i gave RM 10 to my kids. They needed to buy food but it only costed RM 6 for them both. So there should be RM 4 change kan.

"Don't forget to take the change tau!", i sarankan.

"Don't worry, Ummi. I won't let it slide", my daughter said.

"Slide? What slide?", my son asked. May Allah bless him.

"Ah, you won't understand", daughter said.

"Why?", son said.

"You're too young", she answered.

"Why won't you explain? You Malaha Explainer!", he said. We were laughing at this! 😂😂

"You Malaha Explorer!", he continued.

"Iblis!", he added. (referring to Sister Minnie's IG 😂)

// As usual, please remember to boycott pro-isnajis companies, donate to right sources, and doa for the freedom and liberation of Palestinians & Palestine //

Ps: I do truly apologise if i had intentionally or unintentionally offended you. Sorry if my writings were not beneficial to you and caused you inconvenience, and sorry for ignorance. I ada baca my past posts and i'm like "what the hell was i thinking when i wrote this??"😵 posts yang i perasan tu, alhamdulillah la. Tapi yang tak perasan pulak... aiguuu... Sorry....

Ramadan berbeza kali ini

 Alhamdulillah kita bertemu bulan Ramadan in the comfort of our homes, with our loved ones, with alhamdulillah food & water aplenty.

What more can we ask for? Especially given what the Palestinians are currently experiencing.

The smallest amount of what we have can't even compare to what they are having.

I pray to Allah SWT that we are always mindful and grateful for the rezeki that we have, and for our brothers and sisters in Palestine, and also anywhere in the world who are oppressed and deprived of basic human needs to have their rezeki come flowing in now.

It has only been a few days of fasting but Allah... forgive me... i realised how much i've taken things for granted just because i've been blinded by the luxuries i'm surrounded with.

Rasa malu..

I've been watching videos - people being bombed and killed, children starving, people mourning for their lost love & life, and then there were videos of conspiracy theories, parliaments, politicians, truths and lies, sampai jadi nak muntah.

For now i stand with what i know: governments are not their people.

I do feel ashamed though, for not being able to do more. I feel scared too for when the time comes, they will look for me and testify that i only watched and did nothing to help stop this genocide.

I don't know what to do.

We've seen how isnajis and their accomplices been such a dick, no, worse than that. They've blocked aids from entering, the air aids were inefficient, and now they're building a port for sea aid, which is strange because if the amerikens can bring in their trucks to build the port, then why not do the same for the aid trucks?

Propaganda nonstop and it's disgusting. Sometimes i get acid reflux from all this madness.

Just recently my daughter had surgery to remove her tonsils, and i couldn't feel as much 'sorriness' for her because the thought of children in Gaza having to undergo surgery without anaesthetics, the images burned behind my retina, prevented me from it. Of course, i took care of my daughter through everything, and i did as much as i could to ease her through her recovery. Alhamdulillah, my daughter was blessed to be able to go through everything smoothly and comfortably. She had all the medicines needed, and she was even blessed to eat whatever ice creams she had wanted. 

But at the back of my mind, i couldn't help but think how the kids there had to not only go through the painful surgeries, but the recovery too must not have been easy and yet, they have to quickly adapt and move on because threats kept coming. As a mother, i imagine the guilt of seeing your child in pain and how i wish to take the pain upon myself rather than the children... It sucks. 

It really sucks.

I watched a video by Dr Omar Suleiman and i think he spoke for most of us during this time.

may Allah forgive us..

May Allah inspire us with ideas and methods to help our brothers and sisters in Palestine

May Allah provide for them, protect them, and keep their faith strong

May Allah elevate their ranks in Jannah and accept the dead as martyrs

May Allah provide for the orphans, the crippled, the starving, the diseased, and more with all the help they need

Amiiin...

May this Ramadan be filled with goodness and remembrance for Allah SWT.